My friends are so funny sometimes......

So lately I have the tendency to write down funny things that my friends say that relate to dating, being single, and sex.  I really wanted to share some of these.....

My friend posted this on Facebook awhile ago and I found it hilarious.....  

      Why do I have such horrible taste in men? I swear! There's no need for   

      drug sniffing dogs at airports and border check points. Just prop me up 
      to stand post. If our eyes lock and sparks fly and the very sight of him 
      sucks the breath out of my soul he's got substance issues.

Another single friend of mine recently said, "I have come to the conclusion that I am a prime number.  I am a 1, 3, 5, 7, and 9."   Let me explain.  

She is single so she is a 1.  As a fellow single lady I am also a 1.  This is her equivalent to the idea of a third wheel, a fifth wheel, and so on. 

She recently invited some friends to a few different events.  Those friends then included their boyfriends without double checking that that would be ok.  Within minutes she became a 3 and a 5.  More prime numbers.  She tried to see the humor in the situations.  

This one I found amusing.

Recently a male friend and I were out getting a drink.  We were talking about dating.  We were specifically talking about dating (that includes sex) when one person knows it will not go anywhere.  I asked why people just didn't break it off.   He said "Its like being on a sinking ship.  Your not just going to jump into the cold ocean.  Your going to stay on the ship and hope another (preferable more attractive) boat comes along. "   I said , "Well then my boat sunk. I am clinging to a bouy in the middle of the ocean just waiting for a lifeboat." 

Early one Sunday morning I received a text from a friend with this link to a you tube clip.  I clicked it, started watching the video, and laughed hysterically.  Then I was jealous.  I love her and was excited for her......but also a little sad for myself and jealous.