Date of the Month-December # 3 Friday night dinner

So December really was a busy month.  December # 3 and I met on OKCupid.  We have been emailing and then text for quite a while.  We had plans about a week earlier but I canceled.  He text me and asked about dinner on Friday.  So we made plans to get some sushi. 

Before the date I was talking to a friend on facebook.  I told her about my date later that night and our plans to go get sushi.  Her response made me laugh.  She said that Sushi was very sensuous for a first date.  She said it was because of the textures and how you eat.  I can see where she is coming from but I am not talented enough to eat with chopsticks so I use a fork.  Maybe sushi is not as sensuous when you use a fork.   We talked about other suggestive foods.  I said hot dogs and she added an ice cream cone.  Yeah, those are both very suggestive.  Can you think of any others?

So I arrived at the restaurant after December #3 did.  I quickly spotted him sitting at a table.  We quickly hugged.  He is an attractive black man with a very friendly smile and dimples.  He is well articulated and has a smooth voice that is nice to listen to.  The restaurant had some really interesting names for some of their rolls including Sexy Lady and IDid Your Sister.  There were other funny names but I can’t remember them now.  Well December #3 and I ended up ordering a few different rolls and sharing.  I have never shared on a first date but sushi is easy to share. 

December #3 and I talked about food likes and dislikes.  I admitted to not liking onions.  He put his hand up to give me a high 5.  I wasn’t sure what he was doing at first.  Apparently he agreed with me and does not like onions either.   We also talked about sports, work, family, and we had an interesting conversation about hording.  He complemented me on my storytelling.  I am a pretty animated speaker.  I try.  

December #3 is also 6 foot 4.   Yeah, he is over a foot taller than me.  He has broad shoulders and is athletic but more like a football blockers body type.  He also played football and basketball in school and even played against my high school.  So we know some of the same people. 

We sat inside the restaurant talking for a while after dinner.  The waitress put the check down right in front of me and he grabbed it.  He picked up the check and playfully called me a cheap date.  We talked about other things we could do next.  I thought about my earlier conversation with my friend and almost wanted to suggest going to get ice cream cones.  Except for the fact that it is winter and kind of cold outside. 

We left the restaurant.  He walked me to my car and we hugged goodbye.  He asked about going out again and I suggested next weekend.  He sent me a text later saying that he hoped I made it home safely and that he had a really good time tonight.  I guess the ability to text makes it easier to not wait to communicate. 

Merry Christmas and happy reunion

Merry Christmas!!! I hope that everyone had an amazing holiday filled with holiday cheer and good people. 

To me one of the best things about the holidays is getting  together with old friends.  My friend Elizabeth is fantastic at organizing group events.  She really brings people together.

A few days before Christmas, Elizabeth organized a group reunion.  Some old friends were home for the holidays and it had been awhile.  They are Elizabeth's friends from way back in elementary school and I met them all in high school.  They are also all male.  One of the boys chose the restaurant/bar Tilted Kilt. 

The Tilted Kilt is more like a  breastraunt  where all the servers are female and wearing a short skirt and tiny almost a shirt that is lowcut and middrift showing.  A few of the servers are hot.  As a chick I can appreciate that a few of the girls are gorgouse.......but others are not.  The beer is pretty good. 

It was great to catch up with everyone.  We also talked quite a bit about dating.....such an interesting topic to me.  It was great to hear their boy perspective.   One of the guys openly admitted to online dating using OKCupid.   He also told me he reads my blog......I LOVE IT!!!! So I think because he knows I do he felt more open to admitting it. 

We shared first date stories.  He shared a hilarious story that I am going to share it with you and I hope he doesn't mind.  I don't think he will. 

Just so you know, he is an attractive man (I think he is 1/2 japanese and 1/2 white) and athletic.  He has a very friendly smile and is easy going.  He has a somewhat odd schedule with work which I am sure makes dating harder.  He is also multilingual.  He speaks quite a few different languages.  He shared a hilarious story about using the language to pick up girls.  I find it quite brilliant and creative.  While in a bar in a different country he would approach an attractive girl.  He would tell her that his friend had taught him to say a phrase in the native language such as, "you are very beautiful" or "I would like to order a beer please".  He would then say a totally different funny yet inappropriate phrase in the native language.  I wish I could remember the translation.  Sorry.  The girls would giggle and then correct him thus breaking the ice with a cute chick.  BRILLIANT.

Ohh yeah.  Today my practice of never saving phone numbers in my phone bit me in the ass.   I got a nice friendly text wishing me a Merry Christmas.  The text even specifically used my name and it was spelled correctly.   I recognized the number and past text messages.  It was from August.   I can remember so many details about August but I could not remember his name.  Eeks. 
What is that vitamin for you memory?  I think I should start taking it.  I hope I remember to take it. 

Anyways, Merry  Christmas!!! 

Holly Crap....It is a small world.

Ohhhh Crap!   So tonight I went with my friend to this amazing storyteller show at the Hollywood Improv.  It’s a once a month show where all the comedians tell stories based around one theme. Ari Ahaffir who is a hilarious storyteller puts the show together.  My friend and I try to go every month. I would totally recommend it to everyone. The show always has a great line up and is only $5.  Seriously a bargain!!!

Tonight’s theme was Holidaze.  It was a really good show with some great comedians including Joey Diaz, Sean Patton, and a whole bunch of others.  I even ended up winning the shows poster that is signed by all the comedians in the show.  So yeah…..its been a fantastic start to Tuesday night. 

After the show my friend and I decided to go to a bar and get a drink/chill.  I am on winter break so I don’t have to work tomorrow.  Yeah!!!  We decide to go to this chill bar near home. 

We get there and I grabbed a table.  Then I see this familiar face walking toward the table next to us.  It took a second for it to click but, oh yeah, I had managed to run into December #1.  He walked over and said hello but then somehow asked why I was there.  Not in a rude way just almost confused and curious.  We had text a bit earlier in the day and he knew I had mentioned that I was going to the comedy show.  He said he was going to hang out with his brother.  I introduced him to my friend and said that the show ended and we decided to get a drink.  He seemed to think that I knew he would be there with his brother.  I did not.  So great now he thinks I am a crazy stalker.   We talked for a minute then he said he was going over to his table.  Yeah right next to ours.   Crap!!  Why did I pick that table?  Of all the empty tables….why did I pick that one? 

When he got up to leave he did walk over and say good-bye.  He shook my friends hand and gave me a quick awkward hug.  He never introduced his brother or the girl that was with them.  I think she is his brother’s wife or girlfriend.  Whatever!  I look like a crazy stalker and he was a little rude for not introducing us.   Soo Boo on the end of Tuesday night. 

Date of the Month-December #2 Monday night dinner/drinks

I met December # 2 on OkCupid.   I know, Big surprise right!  December # 2 and I had been emailing for months.  I think the first email was in September.   He is originally from Michigan and went to school in Santa Barbara. He moved back and forth a few times but has now been living here for around 2 years.  He is going back to Michigan for Christmas/New years but asked me out and we decided to meet up before the trip. We arranged to meet at the Blue Dog Beer Tavern in Sherman Oaks.  I had never been there before and it is a really cute place.  We quickly hugged but it wasn’t awkward.  He was cuter in person than in a few of his pictures. 

The Blue Dog Beer Tavern has all these fun beers and a lot of them are from California breweries.  The waitress was super fun and friendly.  She told me I look like Patricia Arquette.   I had to google her.  Do I look like her? 

December # 2 was easy to talk to.  We talked about traveling, growing up in Michigan, and our families and friends.  We also talked about sports.  He used to wrestle.  Huhh.  That is an interesting sport.  The uniform itself is just odd to me.   We talked about movies.  He admitted to liking Hangover 2…..not sure why he actually liked it but I wont hold it against him.  We talked about work and doing thing that make a difference in the world and contribute to society. 

After dinner we decided to walk to Starbucks.  He was really good about holding open doors and other chivalrous things.  We held hands briefly and sat at Starbucks talking for another hour.  He walked me to my car and he kissed me good night.   It was a nice kiss.

So now I am feeling guilty that I didn’t tell December # 2 that I had a date the night before but I am also thinking maybe is was stupid to tell December # 1 about the other date.   CRAP!!!!

Any thoughts?

Date of the Month-December #1 Sunday Night Dinner

December is a busy month.  I actually have two December dates lined up back to back.  I did not intentionally do that.  It just kind of happened.  I feel like such a serial dater.  

I met December #1 on OKCupid. He doesn’t live far from me and we actually have similar hangouts.   We had been emailing for a little while before exchanging numbers and then just talked by text.  He asked me out and then picked a spot closer to me.  We arranged location and time via text.  Yes a bit impersonal but efficient. 

He picked this really cute mom and pop restaurant.  Even thought it is not far from my house I had actually never been before.  I was excited to go.  I met December in the waiting area of the restaurant.  I walked up and we very awkwardly hugged.   We sat down at the table and made slightly awkward small talk about the menu. Rough Start. 

December #1 is 5’10 and Middle Eastern/Eastern European decent.  Interesting mix. He is very attractive and has a nice smile.  And after the initial rough start he is really easy to talk to.  Our conversation flowed easily and casually.  We did end up talking about a few of the things you are not supposed to talk about on a first date…. religion and politics.  December #1 is catholic and does attend church but he is very relaxed about it.  He is also very close to his family.  

We covered serious topics but also had silly banter about dancing and the show dance mom.  We talked about traveling.  There were a few common experiences that we talked about.  We have both gone white water rafting in the South Fork American River and both taken cruises to Alaska and Mexico.  He lived in Australia for a few years and I traveled there and loved it.  I can’t even remember all the topics we talked about.  The conversation was so easy. 

We left the restaurant and ended up standing outside in the cold talking for at least another 30 minutes. December #1 speaks Syrian and some French.  He started sharing different silly phrases he knew.

While we were talking outside he would stand closer to me at moments then farther away. He was so cute imitating a French accent and using stereotypical French gestures.  I actually wanted to kiss him at moments. 

We also talked about flying.  Apparently he has the same name as someone on the no fly list so every time he flies he get extra screenings.  I was really impressed with his great attitude about the whole thing.  He wasn’t annoyed or irritated at the process or extra attention.  He had some funny stories to share about it.  

It was getting cold so we ended up sitting in his car and talking for another hour.  He did kiss me.  I love that moment before a first kiss.  The anticipation is so exciting.   After he kissed me he asked what my opinion of kissing on a first date was.  Ya know, that was a really good question.  I enjoy kissing.  We ended up kissing quite a bit.  That was also really easy with him. 

He asked about going out again. I started listing attributes I liked about him.  I said he was intelligent, that he makes me laugh, that is nice that he is close with his family. 

I asked him to then tell me what he liked about me….

He said I was maternal……eeks.   I thought maybe I should tell him I am not sold on the whole idea of having kids but that didn’t seem like first date material.  He explained what he meant a bit and said that I am caring and very considerate.  Why couldn’t he just say that in the first place.  Ahh well.  Maybe I am maternal.  He said I am passionate and attractive, and intelligent.  Go me. 

We talked about dating/past relationships.  Well he talked about his past relationships.  I wasn’t to up front.  If he asked a question I would answer but I am not volunteering info.  He has an interesting dating history. 

Since he asked about going out again/seeing people I wanted to be honest.  I told him that I had a date the next night.  He seemed to up his game a bit and asked a few questions about where and what.  He told me if I was still around at nine I should call him and we could meet up for frozen yogurt.

He asked what my last name was so I wouldn’t be saved as

jaymie ok c anymore. I have not saved his number….it always seems like when I save a guys number in my phone things don’t work out.  Maybe that is a silly superstition.  

I am now a little worried that he will google search my name and this blog will come up.  Eeeks.  I am not sure how a guy would react to knowing that I shared my thoughts about the date on the World Wide Web.

Our date was 6 hours long but it seemed to pass really quick.  I would like to see him again but please don’t ask when the second date is.……it just makes me nervous.  The whole point of this challenge was to take the pressure out of dating.  But maybe that is an impossible idea. 

Tis' the Season

The holiday season is in full swing and with it comes holiday parties and family gatherings.    Being single though the holidays can be both a blessing and a curse.  On one hand, holiday parties are a great place to meet cute single guys.   I dont have to stress over finding the perfect gift for my guy because I dont have a guy. 

But on the other hand holiday parties can suck and ,well,  I dont have a guy.  Holiday parties also have the potential of being ruled by couples.  As a single lady I can only handle seeing so many couples kiss under mistletoe.  Oh and by the way, mistletoe is a parasite that grows on trees and basically feeds off of the tree.  Just because someone has cut it down and tied a little red bow around it does not change the fact that it is a parasite. 

I was reading this Cosmo article about being single for the holidays.   The article mentioned that fact that many single women dislike being single for the holidays and try to stretch out a bad relationship or call up an ex and try to rekindle the past.  While reading the article I was trying to wrack my brain to see if I had ever been guilty of those crimes.  And well I just don't remember.......but I did remember something that happened to a good guy friend of mine.  For the past 3 years almost like clockwork between Thanksgiving and Christmas, my friend will get a text from his ex-girlfriend.  The text messages are not sent just to be friendly.  They always practically beg him to get back together. 

I think the worst part of the holiday season for many people is the midnight kiss on New Years Eve. It is depicted on TV and movies to be so romantic.  While it would be nice to get a kiss that left you feeling weak in the knees NYE, real life just isn't like it is in the movies.   I always surround myself with good friends and usually a fair amount of alcohol. 

A Response

So I did end up hearing back from November.  Five days after I sent the message.  In truth, I think he wrote me back as soon as he got the message.  Another wonderful feature of OKCupid is that you can be a crazy stalker and see when the person was last online.  I did get nosy a few times and look.

Just to refresh your memory….. I decided to send November an email requesting feedback. Our date had gone well.  I wasn’t that into him.  But when it became evident that he wasn’t into me I wanted to know why.  I wanted some feedback. 

His message apologized for the late reply. The message basically said he isn’t sure he wants to be in a relationship right now. He did say that he would hang out with me again but then said, “not sure if I want to date, and not just you, just anyone right now” 

My first thought was, why are you on a dating site if you are not sure you want to date?  Then I started to think that he might just be looking or hoping to find some casual sex.  So I went back to his profile and looked at his answer to the question about what I’m looking for. This is what he put.

• Ages 25–42
• Near me
• Who are single
• For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, activity partners, long-distance penpals, casual ses

Notice the large age span and the fact that casual sex is clearly there. So that kind of leads me to conclude that he isn’t picky with the pussy.  He will accept any casual sex he can get and is quite fond of varietal vag.  Elizabeth my genius friend helped me come up with the second alliteration. 

Work always gets in the way of something....

I know we have all heard the expression, “Work always gets in the way of a good time.” My friend actually used it today on her facebook profile. I have used the expression sarcastically with my students.

 If you didn’t already know, I am a special education teacher. I work with high school students that have moderate to severe cognitive disabilities. I love my job.  I love my students. I love that I have less that two weeks left of work and then three magical weeks off.

Today, I went to training at the district office. I was my looking around the room of about 25 people and noticed that 24 of them were women. The only man in the room was another teacher from my campus. He is a nice guy and really funny and is married with a few kids.

Sitting in the training reminded me of my teacher prep program, again, predominantly women. Then I started thinking about the staff at the school I work at now and other campuses I have worked with. Yep, you guessed it, predominantly women.   So maybe in my case, “work always gets in the way of meeting eligible men.”

A new member/Blog to read

Elizabeth, one of my BFFs and my Date of the Month "enforcer" just started her very own blog.  You can find it http://dobsdateofthemonth.blogspot.com/2012/11/date-of-month.html


Elizabeth decided to join me on the Date of the Month Challenge after I harassed her.  I can be very convincing.  Her brother Paul is also joining us.  Paul is a personal trainer in San Diego and has a ripped ass body.  Once Elizabeth went to pick him up at the gym he worked at.  While waiting she started taking in the gorgeous view of muscular toned men and then accidentally checked out her own brother.  Yeah, I laughed out loud too.  In her defense, she hadn't seen him in months and his back was to her.  Anyways, Paul already had a busy social calendar but is participating with us.  Maybe Elizabeth can share some of his stories on her blog.



Elizabeth describes herself as sassy, witty, smart, apolitically correct.  I read her blog.  It is HILARIOUS and she has had some interesting dates.  So GO read about VD guy.  It is a funny story. 

Oh also last night, Elizabeth read my OKCupid profile and "approved my message".  So I guess I have adequately and appropriately marketed myself.   SWEET!!!