Tinder has been one of my favorite ways to waste time. It do find amusement in checking out the profiles and swiping right or left. In all other ways.....It sucks!
Here is a few examples of why Tinder gets the Finger.
#1
First conversation on tinder.
This guy I matched with sent me a message and said, "Hey". So I responded by saying, "Happy Sunday" His response was that I could make his sunday more happy so I asked how.
He responded by suggesting that I sit on his face. I know what you are thinking. Wow this is a very crude comment. Your possibly thinking EWWW or HOW RUDE. You are probably wondering if I replied. And what I said. And what you would have said in that situation.
I wont leave you to wonder for too long. I did respond.
I said, "Really, does that ever work for you? After you say that do the girls all swoon?
He informed me that No, that line has not worked yet. I responded and said, "Yet you keep trying it. Wouldn't your mother be proud." I think he sensed my sarcasm.
#2
Another Conversation on Tinder
This other guy I was chatting with for a little bit asked me, "Do you know what this site is intended for?"I said I wanted him to enlighten me. Spell it out. We might be having different ideas"
He responded with one word, "F&#KING" I replied, "I must have missed that when I read the description before uploading the app."
#3
LOTS and LOTS of young guys with pictures of their abs and chest. I have now seen the reflection of inside more bathrooms than I can count.
#4
Apparently shirtless pictures do not discriminate by age. I came across a profile for a 50 yr old with his shirt off. You cant erase memories like that.
#5
While wasting time one night I came across the best of the worst. Steve's profile was a picture of a penis and there was some text that said, "Wanna lend me a hand I Love getting handjobs;)"
#6
This was not the worst or the best but I found it amusing. This guys tagline was, "I piss awesomeness"
#7
I came across a lifestyle pusher. His tagline was full off emoticons. It said, "Even if you swipe left....at least switch from cows milk to almond milk or coconut milk....You wont regret it (Thumb up, heart, Thumb up).
#8
I was talking to this guy for about a week. Really funny banter. He was interesting to talk to and not creepy at all. One night he asked what I was up to. I told him I was hanging out with my roommate. I asked if he lived alone. He then was honest and said, "Married"WTF! So I say, "and your wife doesn't think it's odd that you are on tinder?" I said Tinder by name instead of calling it a dating site. He told me that she does not know. What a jerk. I do not approve of that message. But it would be pointless to say anything about his behavior. So i replied, "Ok well, If you have any fun single friends that enjoy long walks on the beach, making spaghetti, and spooning you should lead them my way."
I need to delete the app but it is such a fun waste of time. It is improving my hand eye coordination with the rapid fire swiping left or right.
I haven't bothered because it just reeks of stds.
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