Message that made my day, week, and probably my year!!!

Sometimes friends say the nicest things.    Over a glass of wine, a friend of mine said some really nice things about me and the ways I had impacted her.  I adored hearing it but suggested that she write it down and send it to me.  I didn't want to forget what she had said (come on we were drinking) and I told her that it would be nice to read when I was feeling defeated by the dating monster of just life in general.  She sent it to me a few days later.  Her message made my day, week, and probably my year.  I actually got this message from my friend about two months ago.  

Boys and girls, Today is that day.  I needed a pick me up.  The dating monster is messing with me a bit but life in general is kicking my ass.  

I am teaching middle school for summer school.  WOW!!    Middle School is a different beast. Hormones are racing.  One of my student has a crush on a much older boy.  I could practically see the chemical reaction when she saw him.  He did not return her admiration and she was crushed.  I saw first hand why it is called a crush.  I hated seeing her crying.  So sad.  It also made me think of the various time I have cried over a guy through the years.  I can only remember a few directly.   Maybe another time I will share one of those stories but right now I just want to focus on the positive. 

Do you remember sending notes like this?  

Check out a more modern day example I found...

Here is the email......and no this isn't a ploy for more compliments.  But, If you wanted to tell me how awesome I am.........I would LOVE it.  

This email comes to you as a proclamation of how your positive energy and attitude towards dating, being single, and just living and enjoying life has influenced myself making adjustments to better my own thoughts and actions, as I am sure you have done for others as well.

Being single and dating can be very daunting for some people (and maybe at one time, yours truly who would have preferred being curled up into the fetal position instead). I really admire how open you are about your experiences, and your complete willingness to have these experiences. You are a smart, independent woman who is truly content being single, lives and enjoys life, and just sees having a man in your life as an added bonus. You have taken the pressure out of dating and have found a way to just enjoy the process of dating (not an easy feat!) You have classified your experiences as funny, ironic, fun, crazy, and interesting...rather than traumatic, or a waste of time. And because of this, I know in my heart, you will find yourself in that partnership that will add so much joy to your life at some point. Then it will be time to pass the torch to the rest of the singletons who need your energy and positivity to make dating life a positive one!

I am in such a better headspace now about dating and single life, about letting go of someone who was obviously not right for me and acknowledging that it was more about the companionship than anything else. I have not felt this content and confident in years. When I reflect on how I got here in these past few months, your influence gets most of the credit :) One more single woman back in the dating game!

Thanks for being your spunky, funny, confident, and smart self Jaymie Dean, and keep of on trucking. My only advice for you, don't be afraid to open your heart back up when the time is right. It's OK to be a girl sometimes. And it's okay to "fall" eventually. You might get hurt, or it might be wonderful. Your a strong woman and can handle either. And you will learn something. And then have a good blog entry :)

Cheers! 

Tonight I saw one of the guys I distinctly remember crying over.  I went to my first   quinceañera. It was for my friends daughter.  She looked so beautiful.  I also saw this guy I dated that I met through the friend.    We only dated for a few months and it ended almost a year ago but I did really care for him.  So I wasn't sure how I would feel about seeing him again.  Everything was fine and I am so glad that it wasn't awkward at all.  We talked a bit about what was going on in our lives.  We were both friendly and seemed equally comfortable.  So yeah!!  

 

Happy Sunday!!!

Saw this on Facebook and wanted to share.  Thanks Alice!!

Grandma are so smart!!   My grandma lives in Oregon.  I was recently up there visiting.  She didn't share any words of wisdom. 

But we did make Kaluah together.   What could she have been trying to teach me?  Booze makes everything better.  

I would also like to invite you to share a story about your adventures in dating land.  Maybe a story about your best date. Or your worst date.  Perhaps the tale of the crazy blind date adventure.  Or maybe even that story about that one crazy night.

You too, boys.  I would LOVE to read and post a story from a guys perspective.

Email it to me at jaymieldean@gmail.com

I can post it anonymously.  I cant wait to read your stories.

   

Another person's experience with OKStupid

I was recently browsing on Facebook and saw that one of my friends posted an article about OKCupid.  The article is so delightfully titled OK CUPID: AN EXPLORATION INTO JUST HOW LOW SOME GUYS WILL GO.  My curiosity was peeked.  

The author of the article (a guy) made up a fake female profile.  I REALLY hope he got her permission to use the picture.   In the article he says,  "I set up a profile using the picture of a cute girl I know. Not too sexy of a picture; I didn't want her to look like a slut. "   Wow so considerate.   Also notice the geographic location listed.... we will talk about that more later.

The profile he created for this fake chick was just ridiculous.  He made her a "real winner". (please note the sarcasm in my voice)

Sadly enough, I am sure people like this exist....but I am glad that I dont know any.  In the article he explains that he wanted to make the profile so, "idiotic and unappealing that no one in their right mind would show interest in this girl."  

Well, there are quite a few people out there who are just wrong.  The author says that within 6 hours of creating the profile it had been viewed over 400 times and the inbox contained messages from 39 different guys (who probably didn't read the profile but saw the cute chick and decided to go for it).  

The author admits having a whole lot of fun completely messing with the guys.   Some guys were not complete idiots; after one message they realized what a train wreck the "girl" was and stopped communicating.    Other guys went for it and ignored some REALLY crazy shit that the "girl" said.  

The profile listed Beverly Hills as the geographic location.  Which means that most of but probably not all of the messages were from guys in or around Los Angeles.  I cant help but wonder what responses would happen from guys in other cities.  Would they be similar? Showing that there are sketchy guys all over the place.  Would the number of creepy responses be lower?  Showing that LA is a cesspool of weirdoes and anyone trying to date in this city is doomed.  Could perhaps the number of inappropriate messages be higher indicating that there were more sex crazed maniacs?

What do you think?   Wow Check out this map I found.  Ekks read the little info by LA and NY. 

Here is the link if you want to read the article.
 OK CUPID: AN EXPLORATION INTO JUST HOW LOW SOME GUYS WILL GO

All is well that ends well.....I think that is how the expression goes

So I am completely single again.  Which means I need a July.  Any ideas?

The last set up through a friend went pretty well.....so do any of YOU out there in internet land have a man for me?

Don't get me wrong I am a little sad that it didn't work out with the teacher.  He is a great guy.....just not my great guy.  We had a lot fun but were not compatible for a more intimate relationship.   So we came to the mutual decision that it wasn't working.  

That conversation was done via text.  He did make every effort to meet and do it in person but ya see I am a bit of an avoider when it comes to this kind of conversation.  So I brought it up via text. 

I told him that I really enjoyed his company and sense of humor and then learned that he felt the same which is why it probably lasted as long as it did (2 months).  I suggested hanging out in more platonic way.  At first he said it was against his rules.   Really....he said that.  I responded by texting and said, "I am fucking cool.  Everyone should want to hang out with me."  Really.....I said that.  He explained that he doesn't usually hang out with exes because there is too much mixed emotions from one party or the other but sense that wasn't our case he agreed.  He also agreed with my previous statement.  We meet for a platonic breakfast and has SO much fun.  It was not awkward at all.....at least not for me and I am pretty sure it wasn't awkward for him.   

We just talked and joked around for an hour.  It passed so quickly.  I was even so sweet and gave him some of the Kahluah that I made in Oregon with my grandma.  Yes, I made delicious dark booze with my grandma.  She is one cool grandma....be jealous, very jealous. If your lucky I will share some with you too.  Its really delicious.  

Anyways, I am hopeful that we can remain friends.  I am still friends with a few different guys that I have dated throughout the years.  Its cuz, I am awesome and everyone should want to hang out with me.   LOL!!

Thanks for reading my rant.  Any thoughts?  Add a comment.  YEAHHH!!!!

Odds and Ends

First of all.....

I just got back into town.  I was in Oregon visiting some wonderful family I have up there.  I had a fantastic visit with my grandma (the cool one that reads this blog) and grandpa, my aunt and uncle, and a whole bunch of cousins. 

While I was out there my friend sent me an interesting article.  Posh Country Club snubs breastfeeding mom 

So it isn't ok for me to whip my boob out in public and apparently it isn't ok for the wife of a Norwegian diplomat to try to flash hers out to breastfeed....at least it isnt ok in a posh country club.

I wonder how international relations are going to be now?  The kid should have been wearing one of these. It is a crochet baby boob hat.  Then maybe it would have been ok.  

So I would also like to let you know that that OKCupid has once again earned the name OKStupid.  I was recently perusing different profiles and came across this one guy. 

He was attractive but not downright sexy.  In the self summary part nothing was to exciting.  OKStupid has a question asking what you are really good at.  in the section he had two answers one typical answer and then he put waxing.  huhhhh.   

Then there is a question about the most private thing you are willing to admit.  He filled it out and further explained the waxing comment.  He admitted that he waxes his balls.  Really.  

My first thought was ......wow,  wouldn't that hurt.   But then I decided that that was WAY too much information.  

So I am letting you know that I am officially going to delete my OKStupid account.  Or at least suspend it.   I am debating creating and actually paying for a match.com account.  Sadly, I dont yet have a funny nickname for match.  Any ideas.....

I would also like to invite you to follow my blog by email.  You sign up for it by submitting your email address in the box just above my picture.  When I post a blog it shoots you an email notifying you of my post.