I'm a bad girl!

I'm a bad girl.  And i don't mean it like,  I'm a bad girl, please spank me.  I am not saying it in a seductive flirty voice.  

I literally mean I-AM-A-BAD-GIRL!  I don't cook.  I hate to clean.   The other day I tried to use the oven.  A common household kitchen item and I failed.  Did you know that there is a difference between a convection oven and regular oven setting?  I didn't.  I did however smoke out the kitchen pretty well.  My roommate was there to witness my error and laughed at me. opps!

Here are some other examples of  my culinary failures:
One time, I was trying to make cookies with my step sister.  I accidentally put in a tablespoon of salt instead of the teaspoon the recipe asked for.

Ohh another time as a kid I was in Oregon for the summer.  My aunt was helping my cousin, step sister, and I bake different things to take to the fair.  I don't remember what anyone else made that year but I distinctly remember that my spice cake fell apart and I was the only one that didnt take anything.   Sad face.

There is more examples. But those are the ones that come to mind the quickest.  I can make an awesome salad. Ohh and on the plus if I don't cook then there is less items to clean up after.  

I also would like to share that I don't like to separate lights and darks. I would rather do as few loads of laundry as possible.  See, I use less water.  I am so earth friendly.

The only domestic skills I poses are sewing and knowledge of child development and behavior.
I really enjoy sewing but rarely do it outside of making a few gifts for people and a kick ass original halloween costume every year.  I have an awesome idea for my costume this year.  I can't wait.  My knowledge of child development and behavior is vital to work.  Outside of that, I'm not sold on the whole idea of having kids. Does the fact that I am not sure I want to procreate make me a bad girl?  Nahhhh.....it is 2013 not 1950.  I can always adopt.  

I thought about taking a cooking class.  But then,  I looked into it and it is kind of expensive.  I don't really want to pay money to have someone judge me on my lack of domestic knowledge.

See, I-AM-A-BAD-GIRL!   But I wouldn't know how to be any other way.

Date of the Month-May Saturday Night Dinner

I had my May date of the month last weekend.  May is different from other dates I have been on lately for many different reasons.  First of all May knew he was my May date of the Month.  He has read my blog and actually may even read this post.  May is the teacher that my old teacher set me up with.  Yeah,  a date not found on OKStupid......difference number 2.

The date wasn't totally a blind date since we had talked/text for about 2 week before we actually went out.  I did also at one point declare that it wasn't fair that I didn't know what he looked like when he could see the picture on the blog.  So he sent me a few pictures.

May and I met at the restaurant.  I was debating just suggesting he pick me up since he is a friend of a friend.  I mean, he cant be crazy if my former teacher set me up with him.  But then just decided to err on the side of caution and meet him there.  That way if the date sucked I wouldn't have to endure the awkward drive home.

We agreed to meet at this cute little mom and pop mexican restaurant.  I was running a tiny bit late so I text him to let him know.  I am a very considerate person.

I pulled up to the restaurant and he was waiting outside.  We hugged and headed inside.  May is very easy to talk to.  If he was nervous he hid it well.  May has this confidence that is very attractive.  He is extremely smart but also a little goofy and silly.   He teaches really high level math.  Just F your I.....I dont like math.   May is the first teacher I have gone out with while participating in the date of the month.  Difference #3.  So we had quite a bit to talk about in regards to work.  I wish I could remember all the other things we talked about but I actually cant.  I remember that May is very easy to talk to and there were no awkward silences or weird pauses.  I also remember that May was very quick to compliment me on my eyes when we sat down.

At the restaurant there was a large group there celebrating a birthday.  They were nice and very friendly.  They ended up sharing his birthday cake with us and gave us two pieces.  We chatted with them for a bit as well.  I wonder if they could tell it was a first day.

Ready for difference number 4?  He is the youngest guy I think I have ever dated.  He is only 26.  Now it is only 5 years which in the grand scheme of things isnt much.  The though did cross my mind that I graduated high school and started college before he was even in high school.  I would consider him a very mature well rounded 26 and well i am kind of a energetic playful 31......maybe it evens out?

After dinner I suggested going somewhere else.  We jumped into his car and went to this cute martini bar.  The place had at least 75 different martinis.  Some had very interesting sexual sounding names.  We sat around and talked a lot more.  He is really easy to talk to and very chatty.  I told him that I was going to chaperone the prom for the high school I work at.  He also agreed to chaperone the prom for the high school he works at.  We talked about how elaborate the students get to ask each other to prom.  Its crazy, they make huge posters and bring flowers just to ask someone to prom.   He asked me to be his date to chaperone prom.   I was a little caught off guard but also kinda flattered that he was comfortable enough around me to invite me around his coworkers.  He joked and asked if he needed to make a grand gesture to ask me.  

We left the bar and he dropped me off at my car.  We hugged and I quickly kisses his cheek.

So next weekend is the prom...... ohh I need to pick an outfit and do my nails.

Crazy Stories

I believe that it is impossible to navigate the treacherous waters of the dating pool completely unscathed.  Along the way you are bound to hit a few bumps and get some interesting war wounds.   I share the good, the bad, and even the ugly.  I am sure that it might also be nice for you to read about other peoples experiences.  So if you have an experience that you would like to share feel free to email it to me.  My email is jaymieldean@gmail.com.  I can share it anonymously if you would like/feel more comfortable.  It feels pretty cathartic to share my experiences and has definally helped me to just get it all out.  

This story is from my friend, Jessica.  She actively reads the blog and even makes comments.  I really enjoy reading peoples comments.  Jessica has some interesting stories.  I would also like to state that she met her current amazing boyfriend on OKCupid and they have been together for over 4 years.  Yeahhhhh!!!!  

Here is Jessica's Story.......

So it has been many years since these events have come to pass so I feel totally comfortable speaking candidly about the previous guys I have met (mostly) online, various websites, and subsequently had some amount of time dating them. As I said to Jaymie, I had to kiss a lot of frogs to find my prince and I think its only fair I share the highlights. I’m finding that many of these stories have a lot to do with my own ignorance and immaturity at the time but they are still fun. 

First one that comes to mind was someone I like to refer to as “by the way” guy. I used to go bowling every week with a bunch of coworkers, either the beer was cheap or the bowling was, or both I don’t remember but it was a big group with a decent turn out and most of us were actually into bowling so it was a lot of fun. This guy approaches me, we start small talking and we actually had a lot of chemistry. He was the sister of one of my coworkers friends so he wasn’t just a stranger who approached me. We end up having (what I thought would no doubt be) a one night stand that did not really end in the morning. Much to my discomfort! He just … never really left. So I at some point made something up about having to do some studying (it was summer) and he leaves… but not before getting my number and promising to call me. I thought he was cute and all so I went with it, not expecting to hear from him again.

He calls me the next day. It doesn’t take long for me to figure out why he was so interested in a catch like me. He tells me that he has a meeting near my house until 7pm and can he come over after and he will take me to dinner. At dinner it comes out that he doesn’t exactly have a job. So I pay. I’m pretty easy going and I’ve been broke before so I did not make a big deal about this. Its what happens next that really makes my head explode, and how he gets his nickname. After about a week he calls me again on the same night of the week we had dinner and said he has his meeting, would I like to come with him, he’s aloud to bring a friend. Being the wise old age of 21 at the time I say “sure” and its not until the meeting starts that I find out he’s attending court mandated narcotics anonymous meetings. He was “busted for having crack, but I don’t do that stuff”. How many times do you think he’s used that line? After an eye opening meeting, we go get something to eat and I’m thinking, that’s it, I don’t want anything to do with this. This is the guy version of a hot mess. So I decide that I will tell him after we finish dinner as to not make for an awkward meal. I had to drive him home as it came out that he also doesn’t have a license and I came inside to use the restroom. His mom stops him and says “so and so called, she’s going to drop (insert name I can’t remember here) off in 30 minutes” and he turns to me with a deer in the headlights look and says “oh, by the way I have a son”.

Now…. We were young, I was 21 and I believe he was 23 or so. So I see living with mom, stupid mistakes, etc. but in my opinion in no way, shape or form is “I have a son” a “by the way” statement!!! You say ‘by the way, I can’t go out on Friday, I have to work’ or ‘by the way, I picked up that movie you wanted to watch’ not…. ‘by the way, I have a son’. That was the icing on the cake for me and I literally slowly backed out of the room and drove away as fast as possible! I also sadly stopped going to bowling as to never accidently run into ‘by the way’ guy again! 

The next one that comes to mind is someone I refer to as ‘crazy guy’ because this guy literally was. He approached me online through some site I was on and starts chatting me up. He seems nice enough and in his picture he was really good looking so I was all about it. Crazy guy seemed too good to be true. He had a nice place to himself in a fancy building where you can’t even get into the lobby without being ‘buzzed in’, a good job, a nice body, very charismatic, smart and well traveled. I kind of ruined it for you with the nickname but this story does not disappoint. So I go up to his area first ( I was living in Long Beach and he was just north of LA somewhere I forget). He takes me to dinner and I had such little hearts in my eyes for this guy that I missed all the warning signs. The quick references to ‘crazy exes’ and ‘daddy issues’ should have been huge red flags but what’s a naïve, twitter pated girl to do? After dinner I think I more or less headed home, kept it pretty simple for a first date but had it just ended there, so would the story. 

Fast forward about 3 dates and I’m thinking, ok most guys expect something physical by the third date and I was totally there but I wasn’t about to just throw myself at him, gotta make a guy work for it, am I right? So I go up to his place and we were just talking, drinking wine and cooking dinner. Now, I have racked my brain 1,000 times over and I still cannot pinpoint the ‘tipping point’ when things went south here but I know we were kissing in the kitchen and things were progressing and I either said or did something to set him off because he literally freaked out on me. Maybe I was teasing too much or playing too hard to get but he called me all sorts of horrible names he said I was a manipulator, a prostitute, a tease, all these colorful terms with f-bombs, c-words, you name it!! I was SHOCKED. So, I’m a strong independent woman and I say “I don’t have to take this, I’m leaving.” I grab my purse and storm out. 

I get to my car and I’m searching desperately for my keys. I can’t find them. I’m panicking. Big time. I look everywhere in my purse, I even dump the entire thing out and this is when I’m realizing that I probably shouldn’t even be driving even if I did have my keys (divine intervention?). so I call him from my cell phone. Nothing. I call again. Nothing. I buzz his apartment from the buzzer panel. Nothing. I buzz again. Nothing. I’m literally panicking at this point and I realize…. I have to pee soooo bad!! I’m thinking it cannot get any worse! I must have called him 100 times between my phone and the buzzer and he was completely ignoring me. I am absolutely sobbing at this point because I have to pee so bad that I finally just find a bush to take cover behind and I fell midstream and peed all over my pants and fell into my pee!!! I’m laughing my ass off about it now but at the time it was the worst night of my life. 

So how on earth did I get myself out of this situation? A guardian angel, that’s how. I call a friend that lived about 10 minutes from where I was and he came and got me, let me shower, gave me some clean sweat pants, let me stay the night and helped me get my keys back the next morning. (the guy had unceremoniously thrown them on the ground, thankfully nobody had found them) I do not know what I would have done without him because I was absolutely up a creek without a paddle, that is for sure. Needless to say, I never ever spoke to crazy guy again… and I was much more careful with whose apartment I had one too many glasses of wine in!